church?

I love church now. After going 7 hrs/sunday for a few years, it became a pretty strenuous chore but now i've discovered the true merit of the refreshing nature of a Sunday morning at church. I've for some reason always seen myself as the older man who sits in the back, enjoys every song, tithes, takes sermon notes, and leaves without really socializing or engaging in any serious conversations with fellow members. I always saw myself taking intense pride in dressing up each Sunday, since this is something i never do. I rarely look in the mirror before leaving the house for the day, the clothes I wear are just what's there (no fashion sense), and my hair/beard are usually unkempt. Thus, dressing up each Sunday would be a lovely goal for me and now i've started to make this a reality. 

I don't care if anybody else thinks I look nice, just like I dont care when other people think I look shitty, but the process of waking up a little earlier than usual, setting aside time to iron/comb/gel is a constant reminder, to me, of the dedication to which i am subject. 

I dont think God cares what I look like, and I dont really either, but this strange form of meditation has slightly opened my eyes to the requirement of being a mature, sustainable person. I figure that I will continue this routine and one day, i can be the religious man in the back that is just such a lovely image of grace and beauty. 

Plus, my beautiful girlfriend joined me today and knew when to let me worship, and when i would want to hold hands without me telling her...she impresses me once more. we talked about the above form of servitude and she agrees that the process, even though she must go through it every day, of getting ready and proper each Sunday morning rather than sleeping is a legitimate meditation. 

Glad to know im not the only one who thinks this way :)

ticking away

the moments that make up

the dull day